22 June 2016
ITALY 0
IRELAND 1 (Brady 85)
This was the steaming pile of shit you would expect from a Martin O'Neil side against an Italy team that had already qualified and thus were effectively playing a friendly.
Insigne nearly scored a carbon copy of the Eder goal but his shot came back off the right post. Bonucci was tackled by McGeady as he tried to bring the ball out of defence and dived, looking like a chump as the ref waved away his protests, Hoolahan ran onto the loose ball and shot straight at Sirigu. Mental midget. He made amends with a superb cross for Brady's winner, Sirigu didn't help matters by charging off his line and diving into thin air.
Both ITV and BBC's commentators went wild. Do they not know that Ireland is not part of the UK and that the Irish hate the British? Bandwagon jumping idiots.
Attendance : 44,268
Assists : Hoolahan
SWEDEN 0
BELGIUM 1 (Nainggolan 84)
Berg registered Sweden's first shot on target in the tournament, volleying a rebound from a free kick straight at Courtois. Bad miss. The second half was much better than the first. KDB forced a save and put in Lukaku for a one on one, which he of course missed, the last game was an aberration. Ibrahimovic stung Courtois' palms with a free kick. KDB headed off the line and Nainggolan made sure Sweden were one of the few teams actually eliminated in this stupid format with a brilliant right foot shot from the edge of the box, which went in off Zengin's arse. Substitute Benteke should have scored a second.
A very good display by the Belgians. They won more comfortably than the scoreline suggests.
Attendance : 34,011
Assists : Hazard
HUNGARY 3 (Gera 19, Dzsudzsak 47, Dzsudzsak 55)
PORTUGAL 3 (Nani 42, Ronaldo 50, Ronaldo 62)
There are certain games in every tournament that make you feel like you're watching a major competition and not a random bunch of friendlies. This was one of those games, one of the few games that actually felt important, felt like both teams were carrying the weight of their nations on their shoulders.
Standing near the edge of the D, Gera bounced Nani's headed clearance off his chest and thrashed a half volley into the right corner. Brilliant strike. Nani caught Kiraly by surprise with an instant shot from Ronaldo's pass to equalise. The opening 20 minutes of the second half were sensational. Dzsudzsak restored Hungary's lead with a left footed free kick that cannoned in off Andre Gomes, wrong footing Rui Patricio in the Portugal goal. Ronaldo finally scored and it was worth the wait, a lovely back heel volley from Mario's in-swinging cross. Dzsudzsak smashed a free kick into the Portuguese wall, got hold of the rebound himself, took a couple of steps as he dribbled to the left then let rip with his trusty left foot and, once again, via a massive deflection (off Nani) beat Patricio all ends up. He almost killed himself as he jumped the advertising hoardings and slipped on concrete, idiot. Cometh the hour, cometh the man. Ronaldo lost his marker to power home Quaresma's cross.
Ronaldo may be, well not may be, is an ego-centric prick but anyone that gives €600,000 in charity (his UCL win bonus) can do no wrong in my book. A rapid counter attack down the left ended with Elk smashing a shot against the inside of a post. The insanity died down as both sides seemed content with a draw.
Attendance : 55,514
Assists : n/a, Ronaldo, n/a, Mario, n/a, Quaresma
ICELAND 2 (Bodvarsson 18, Traustason 94)
AUSTRIA 1 (Schopf 60)
Austria, largely because of Alaba, were expected to do well in this tournament but have been one of the duds. The Icelanders, who have a ridiculous alphabet with all sorts of wank symbols that make Anglicising the names a f**king nightmare, had already gone close to scoring, Gudmundsson hit the woodwork, before Bodvarsson steered a shot past Almer after Arnason headed on a throw-in. The Austrians got a somewhat fortunate penalty on 37 minutes but Dragovic missed. Schopf scored a brilliant equaliser, he crushed Arnason as he ran at him at high speed before switching the ball onto his left foot as he turned sharply to the left before placing a shot into the bottom right corner. In injury time Almer whacked a hail Mary ball into the Iceland box and they countered. Bjarnason volleyed forward a pass, sending Bjarnason down the left (seriously it's bad enough they're all named son but now the twats are sharing the first letters as well!?!? What else do they share, wives?), he made a diagonal run into the box and rolled a pass to the back post for Traustason to tap-in and set up a last 16 clash with England. Roy Hodgson you lucky, lucky bastard.
Attendance : 68,714
Assists : Arnason, Alaba, Bjarnason
Last 16 Draw
1. Poland vs Switzerland. Saturday June 25. 14.00
2. Wales vs Northern Ireland. Saturday June 25. 17.00
3. Croatia vs Portugal. Saturday June 25. 20.00
4. France vs Republic of Ireland. Sunday June 26. 14.00
5. Germany vs Slovakia. Sunday June 26. 17.00
6. Hungary vs Belgium. Sunday June 26. 20.00
7. Italy vs Spain. Monday June 27. 17.00
8. England vs Iceland. Monday June 27. 20.00
Quarter-Finals
9. Switzerland/Poland vs Croatia/Portugal. Thursday June 30. 20.00
10. Wales/Northern Ireland vs Hungary/Belgium. Friday July 1. 20.00
11. Germany/Slovakia vs Italy/Spain. Saturday July 2. 20.00
12. France/Republic of Ireland vs England/Iceland. Sunday July 3. 20.00
Semi-Finals
Winner of 9 vs Winner of 10
Winner of 11 vs Winner of 12